If you've found your way to this page, you're likely to be considering therapy. Probably because something no longer feels manageable on your own.

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Welcome to the human club. Most people's stories feature moments like these. Mine has.

 

As a result, you may be wondering, among other things:

What is happening to me? How might therapy help? How do you work, Nathan? Is this worth it? How long will it take? Where do I start?

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I've tried below to answer these common questions in the hope that it may be of some help to you.

 

What is happening to me?

Ultimately, a part of you has been overwhelmed. In some shape or form, your mental and emotional capacity has been stretched beyond what it can comfortably hold. Either by some recent emotionally painful events or losses, or by the cumulative effects of a long-term pattern of emotional avoidance.

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Everyone's story is unique, so understanding the detail is impossible without exploration. Thankfully, there are some patterns I've seen often enough and ideas that I use that often provide a helpful place to begin.

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Firstly – sooner or later, some painfully overwhelming events happen to everyone. When they do, we tend to push the vulnerable feelings associated with them down, away or to one side. Into something I call The Unsaid Space. You can think of it as the place where you store your unexplored confusion, pain and grief – your emotional baggage.

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Secondly - I've yet to meet anyone whose Unsaid Space doesn't have a limit. A capacity. When that capacity is reached, we experience internal overwhelm, which eventually surfaces in some form of lost, anxious or depressive sensations and thoughts, in our minds and bodies.

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Thirdly - when that capacity has been reached, the ways we learned to manage can stop working as well as they used to. Keeping busy, thinking, staying strong, distracting yourself or pushing through, become less effective when there's too much to contain.

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How can therapy help?

The compassionate and supportive relationship that good therapy provides works as a safe space in which to meet, understand and integrate the experiences you've been avoiding but still carrying – at your own pace.

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The aim of therapy isn't to become someone else. It's to understand yourself so well that you no longer have to be driven by what has gone unsaid or unresolved. When persevered with, people become more confident, more connected, more resilient, and able to make freer choices rather than simply trying to get by.

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How do you work?

I work with individuals and families in an integrated way. In practice, it means I tailor therapy for each individual client, rather than using a single model.

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My approach draws on thousands of hours working with people and their stories. Rather than relying on a single therapeutic model, I draw from a range of approaches I've studied and worked with. Depending on what feels most helpful, our work may include breathing, movement, writing, EMDR, time in nature or trauma release techniques – not just talking things through, because deeper change usually involves more than words.

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My main focus is on how you experience and relate to your life – your thoughts, feelings, body, and relationships. The aim is to uncover the stories and ways you've learnt to live by and protect yourself from difficult experiences, and how those patterns shape your life today. As they make more sense, you naturally develop new ways of understanding yourself and responding to life.

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Is it worth it?

Many people hesitate because therapy feels like a significant investment. I get that. The question I encourage people to consider instead isn't what therapy may cost them, but what it'll cost them to spend another year living with old patterns that affect them and their relationships so negatively, particularly the one they have with themselves.

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How long will it take?

Everyone's different. Some people notice meaningful changes quickly; others find their patterns are deeper and so take longer to understand and shift. In my experience, those who find a professional they trust and commit to the process almost always notice meaningful change within a few months.

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How do I start?

In short, from wherever you are. There is no right way. You don't have to arrive knowing exactly what's wrong or what you want to say. Most people don't. They just begin with whatever feels most present, and we make sense of it together from there.

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It's usually best to try different professionals until you find one you feel comfortable working with. From there, my experience has been that change is absolutely possible.

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I offer a free 20-minute introductory conversation to discuss your situation and see whether working together feels right for you. You can book one via the button below. We can then agree the goals and rhythm of our work in our first session and review them as needed.

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Individual Fees

£85 per 50 minute session

Weekly or fortnightly 

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​Family Fees

£110 per 50 minute session (2 people)

Additional family members £25 each.  

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If you'd like to hear what previous clients have said about working with me, you'll find some testimonials here.